Good Morning and have we had enough award shows already or what?
You know, it's really amazing how, well you never want to call anybody stupid, but if the shoe fits: Man checks into jail with joints sewn in underwear
Who out there thinks this is a good idea and how exactly do you sew joints in your underwear? I mean, won't they break apart when you sit down? This guy's probably been in trouble before, so he must know there's going to be a pat down heading into prison.
Then again, we see this kind of thing all the time.
For instance, have you been driving during one of these snow storms only to have some 'smart' driver pull right up to your bumper.
Happened to me last week while the snow was coming down. While making the normal afternoon school run, we were sliding down an unplowed side street. All of a sudden, this other car comes flying up behind. Slams on the breaks, then starts honking the horn and yelling to hurry up.
Sure, buddy, now get off the road before you need new underwear.
Monday, January 31, 2011
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
Rise and Shine --- Cut, print
Good Morning and, well, it won't be said today!
So, the Oscar nominations came out yesterday and once again, I've only seen one of the movies (Toy Story 3). While it was a good movie, I don't know if it's 'Best Picture' worthy, but some years finding 10 nominees stretches the envelope a bit.
Then again, it's probably as much about politics as everything else has become in this day and age. Know the right people, your movie gets a push. Go outside the box and you have to buy your own ticket to the show.
Hey, whatever works. It's Hollywood. It's not like real life.
So, now that the nominees are out, the big push starts. Try to get out and see the top nominated movies before the Feb. 27 show.
Anybody game for a movie run? I always wanted to try one of those movie marathons where they show all the nominees in one day.
That might be a little too tough, but you never know.
By the way, with all the talk about snubs and nominees, here's one that was overlooked and should get a statue just because it's so good:
So, the Oscar nominations came out yesterday and once again, I've only seen one of the movies (Toy Story 3). While it was a good movie, I don't know if it's 'Best Picture' worthy, but some years finding 10 nominees stretches the envelope a bit.
Then again, it's probably as much about politics as everything else has become in this day and age. Know the right people, your movie gets a push. Go outside the box and you have to buy your own ticket to the show.
Hey, whatever works. It's Hollywood. It's not like real life.
So, now that the nominees are out, the big push starts. Try to get out and see the top nominated movies before the Feb. 27 show.
Anybody game for a movie run? I always wanted to try one of those movie marathons where they show all the nominees in one day.
That might be a little too tough, but you never know.
By the way, with all the talk about snubs and nominees, here's one that was overlooked and should get a statue just because it's so good:
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
Rise and Shine --- Where's the beef?
Good Morning and how about those 76ers?!?
OK, now, before I present this story, I have to say that anybody who eats at a fast-food place and thinks they are eating healthy, well, I'm glad that purple, flying monkey helps you out so often.
So, anyway, there's THIS STORY about a lawsuit against Taco Bell.
It seems an Alabama law firm has sued Taco Bell for false advertising. It appears the 'beef' the company uses doesn't really meet the minimum standards set by the government for it to actually be beef.
According to the suit there is so much other, uh, stuff in the mix it contains only 35 percent actual beef. Let's hope they don't start checking out the 'cheese.'
You have to figure (and, it's true, I've seen the movie) most of these places get their 'beef' from the same farms.
So, think about how much is in that Big Mac you enjoyed last night.
Then again, many are still eating Scrapple, so, I guess it's better to be misinformed.
OK, now, before I present this story, I have to say that anybody who eats at a fast-food place and thinks they are eating healthy, well, I'm glad that purple, flying monkey helps you out so often.
So, anyway, there's THIS STORY about a lawsuit against Taco Bell.
It seems an Alabama law firm has sued Taco Bell for false advertising. It appears the 'beef' the company uses doesn't really meet the minimum standards set by the government for it to actually be beef.
According to the suit there is so much other, uh, stuff in the mix it contains only 35 percent actual beef. Let's hope they don't start checking out the 'cheese.'
You have to figure (and, it's true, I've seen the movie) most of these places get their 'beef' from the same farms.
So, think about how much is in that Big Mac you enjoyed last night.
Then again, many are still eating Scrapple, so, I guess it's better to be misinformed.
Monday, January 24, 2011
Rise and Shine --- Looks out a window
Good Morning and keep the heater on!
So, for all you Eagles fans out there who were dreaming about going to a Super Bowl this year, uh, your team wasn't nearly as good as the four who played yesterday.
How's this for an early prediction: Expect another parade in Pittsburgh in a couple of weeks.
Speaking of predictions, let's get on these weather yahoos a little bit. Now, we know they like to pump up the possibility of snow. Nothing brings in ratings (or page views) like the prediction of a storm.
"Be Careful," they tell us. "It's going to a be a nasty commute. The morning is going to be a mess. Snow, ice, snow, snow, snow."
People get caught up in the craziness. Last week, we had it twice. There was supposed to be a lot of ice and snow Tuesday morning. OK, there was some, but it didn't cripple the area.
Then it was supposed to come again Thursday. This time, it was nothing more than a coating on the sidewalks.
Then the schools get caught up. Parents (rightly) want to know about closings or delays as early as possible so they can set up the day (either take it off from work or try to find some kind of childcare). So, a dire prediction doesn't give the officials much time to react.
Last week, most schools called for Thursday delays even though it turned out to be much ado about nothing.
There's no way to get away from all the weather, so the best predictor is your own eyes. Unless, of course, Grandma has a trick knee.
So, for all you Eagles fans out there who were dreaming about going to a Super Bowl this year, uh, your team wasn't nearly as good as the four who played yesterday.
How's this for an early prediction: Expect another parade in Pittsburgh in a couple of weeks.
Speaking of predictions, let's get on these weather yahoos a little bit. Now, we know they like to pump up the possibility of snow. Nothing brings in ratings (or page views) like the prediction of a storm.
"Be Careful," they tell us. "It's going to a be a nasty commute. The morning is going to be a mess. Snow, ice, snow, snow, snow."
People get caught up in the craziness. Last week, we had it twice. There was supposed to be a lot of ice and snow Tuesday morning. OK, there was some, but it didn't cripple the area.
Then it was supposed to come again Thursday. This time, it was nothing more than a coating on the sidewalks.
Then the schools get caught up. Parents (rightly) want to know about closings or delays as early as possible so they can set up the day (either take it off from work or try to find some kind of childcare). So, a dire prediction doesn't give the officials much time to react.
Last week, most schools called for Thursday delays even though it turned out to be much ado about nothing.
There's no way to get away from all the weather, so the best predictor is your own eyes. Unless, of course, Grandma has a trick knee.
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
Rise and Shine --- Not that kind of cold
Good Morning and isn't it nice to wake up without fresh, new snow on the ground!
So, for the second time this winter, a cold has gotten ahold of me. Not just any cold, mind you, one of those not even Nyquil can solve. Take the shot, expect some good sleep and two hours later, cough, cough, cough.
Man, that's annoying, especially when your alarm goes off at 3:30 a.m.
So, while I battle through the sniffles and the stuffy head, take this...
So, for the second time this winter, a cold has gotten ahold of me. Not just any cold, mind you, one of those not even Nyquil can solve. Take the shot, expect some good sleep and two hours later, cough, cough, cough.
Man, that's annoying, especially when your alarm goes off at 3:30 a.m.
So, while I battle through the sniffles and the stuffy head, take this...
Tuesday, January 18, 2011
Rise and Shine --- Ice, Ice, Baby
Good Morning and welcome to one of those days you wish you could just stay in bed!
I remember the winter of 1992-93, the worst winter in history (well, OK, maybe not, but it was still bad). Instead of snow, we had freezing rain and ice seemingly every day.
The ice was sometimes so thick on the cars it seemed like you would need a hammer and chisel to knock it off.
Even the old trick of starting the car and putting on the defroster only meant you wasted gas for a half hour (of course, gas was like a dollar a gallon, so there).
Every time I hear a weather report calling for ice, I remember back to those days of sliding into work. There was no getting around it.
Hopefully, today's strange, crunchy snow isn't what we are going to be seeing for the rest of the winter.
I remember the winter of 1992-93, the worst winter in history (well, OK, maybe not, but it was still bad). Instead of snow, we had freezing rain and ice seemingly every day.
The ice was sometimes so thick on the cars it seemed like you would need a hammer and chisel to knock it off.
Even the old trick of starting the car and putting on the defroster only meant you wasted gas for a half hour (of course, gas was like a dollar a gallon, so there).
Every time I hear a weather report calling for ice, I remember back to those days of sliding into work. There was no getting around it.
Hopefully, today's strange, crunchy snow isn't what we are going to be seeing for the rest of the winter.
Monday, January 17, 2011
Rise and Shine --- Awarded by sleep
Good Morning and welcome back to another one of those winter weeks!
So, having not much to do last night, I turned on the Golden Globes.
Five minutes later, I was having trouble keeping my eyes open. Ten minutes later, I was fast asleep.
I don't know, maybe sometime in the past, these award shows were fun to watch. You could see your favorite movie and TV stars yucking it up.
Now, though, thanks to the Internet, we know all about these people and, to me anyway, they aren't entertaining outside of their roles.
Robert DeNiro is good as a gangster, but not so good as a stand-up comedian.
Ricky Gervais is good as a comedian, but when he's using inside talk to bust on fellow actors, well, it seems like we are just viewing a frat party.
I guess it doesn't help I hadn't seen many of the movies or TV shows being honored, but, still, it was boring.
Even the winners were terrible. In order to make the show go quick, they were rushing speeches, giving lists of names nobody knew and rambling about how great it is to win.
Can't wait for the next one!
ZZZZzzzzz
So, having not much to do last night, I turned on the Golden Globes.
Five minutes later, I was having trouble keeping my eyes open. Ten minutes later, I was fast asleep.
I don't know, maybe sometime in the past, these award shows were fun to watch. You could see your favorite movie and TV stars yucking it up.
Now, though, thanks to the Internet, we know all about these people and, to me anyway, they aren't entertaining outside of their roles.
Robert DeNiro is good as a gangster, but not so good as a stand-up comedian.
Ricky Gervais is good as a comedian, but when he's using inside talk to bust on fellow actors, well, it seems like we are just viewing a frat party.
I guess it doesn't help I hadn't seen many of the movies or TV shows being honored, but, still, it was boring.
Even the winners were terrible. In order to make the show go quick, they were rushing speeches, giving lists of names nobody knew and rambling about how great it is to win.
Can't wait for the next one!
ZZZZzzzzz
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
Rise and Shine --- Take that
Good Morning and welcome to the winter wonderland!
You know, I overheard the best description of snow while waiting outside of school the other day:
"You know what snow is?" asked a second-grader to his preschool sister.
"Snowman poop."
I remember when snow used to be fun, of course that was before I had to worry about driving through icy, slushy roads to get to work.
So, when does that disconnect happen? When you get old enough to drive? When you start working? When you have to worry about schedules for school delays or closings?
I don't think I really started hating winter weather until 1992 when we seemed to have an ice storm every other day.
Last year's snow after snow after snow sealed the deal.
This year, well, we've lucked out. This stuff isn't real heavy and, once the plows go through, the roads are fine.
Still, bring on spring!
You know, I overheard the best description of snow while waiting outside of school the other day:
"You know what snow is?" asked a second-grader to his preschool sister.
"Snowman poop."
I remember when snow used to be fun, of course that was before I had to worry about driving through icy, slushy roads to get to work.
So, when does that disconnect happen? When you get old enough to drive? When you start working? When you have to worry about schedules for school delays or closings?
I don't think I really started hating winter weather until 1992 when we seemed to have an ice storm every other day.
Last year's snow after snow after snow sealed the deal.
This year, well, we've lucked out. This stuff isn't real heavy and, once the plows go through, the roads are fine.
Still, bring on spring!
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
Rise and Shine --- Maybe
Good Morning and welcome to another one of those days!
It's been kind of interesting to see how those who pushed violence over the last few years were the first to announce, in the wake of the shootings of the Congresswoman in Arizona, that it wasn't their fault.
Well, not so fast skipper.
Maybe the nut over there in Phoenix had a worm eating his brain. Maybe he was so far gone it was only a matter of time before he hurt himself or somebody else.
Maybe, just maybe, though, this Jared Loughner would have picked up a rock instead of a gun.
Maybe if Rush Limbaugh and Glenn Beck and the rest of their hate club weren't always pushing an agenda that made it seem like violence was the only answer, there would be less of this kind of stuff.
I'm sorry, when you put rifle targets over a certain area of the country before an election, you are asking those with the worms to do something stupid.
When you hold up those who bring guns to political rallies as some kind of hero, maybe you are part of the problem instead of the solution.
The great thing about these people who throw that stuff out there is they can fall back and say, "Hey, I never said anybody should get shot."
Like that makes it any better.
It's been kind of interesting to see how those who pushed violence over the last few years were the first to announce, in the wake of the shootings of the Congresswoman in Arizona, that it wasn't their fault.
Well, not so fast skipper.
Maybe the nut over there in Phoenix had a worm eating his brain. Maybe he was so far gone it was only a matter of time before he hurt himself or somebody else.
Maybe, just maybe, though, this Jared Loughner would have picked up a rock instead of a gun.
Maybe if Rush Limbaugh and Glenn Beck and the rest of their hate club weren't always pushing an agenda that made it seem like violence was the only answer, there would be less of this kind of stuff.
I'm sorry, when you put rifle targets over a certain area of the country before an election, you are asking those with the worms to do something stupid.
When you hold up those who bring guns to political rallies as some kind of hero, maybe you are part of the problem instead of the solution.
The great thing about these people who throw that stuff out there is they can fall back and say, "Hey, I never said anybody should get shot."
Like that makes it any better.
Monday, January 10, 2011
Rise and Shine --- Now, that's cold!
Good Morning and welcome to the snow-covered parking lot!
After sliding through the parking lot this morning (yes, two days after the latest snowfall you still need your boots in some places), I got to thinking about cold.
Now, it's been cold outside the last few months. We've seen temperatures below freezing. We've seen wind blow through.
Before yesterday's Eagles/Packers playoff game, we here at delcotimes.com decided to try something different. We provided Eagles fans with an alternative playoff pregame show live from the tailgates.
While you knew it was cold, while moving around trying to get people to talk, running the camera and making sure the sound was OK (sometimes, unsuccessfully), the cold didn't seem to bad.
Then, after packing up and carrying the equipment back to the car, well, that's when it hit.
It actually took most of the game to thaw out.
So, long story short (too late), it got me to thinking about those who don't have the opportunity to get out of the cold. There are people out there (admit it, you see them all the time, but try to ignore them), who don't have the opportunity to warm up.
When it gets bitter, they do the best they can. I think we can help, though.
Carry an extra pair of gloves around and, instead of speeding up your walking, just give them to the person. Sometimes, something small can make a world of difference.
After sliding through the parking lot this morning (yes, two days after the latest snowfall you still need your boots in some places), I got to thinking about cold.
Now, it's been cold outside the last few months. We've seen temperatures below freezing. We've seen wind blow through.
Before yesterday's Eagles/Packers playoff game, we here at delcotimes.com decided to try something different. We provided Eagles fans with an alternative playoff pregame show live from the tailgates.
While you knew it was cold, while moving around trying to get people to talk, running the camera and making sure the sound was OK (sometimes, unsuccessfully), the cold didn't seem to bad.
Then, after packing up and carrying the equipment back to the car, well, that's when it hit.
It actually took most of the game to thaw out.
So, long story short (too late), it got me to thinking about those who don't have the opportunity to get out of the cold. There are people out there (admit it, you see them all the time, but try to ignore them), who don't have the opportunity to warm up.
When it gets bitter, they do the best they can. I think we can help, though.
Carry an extra pair of gloves around and, instead of speeding up your walking, just give them to the person. Sometimes, something small can make a world of difference.
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
Rise and Shine --- Lottery hangover
Good Morning and I'm still here, having not won the Mega Millions last night!
Of course, even if I had won, I'd probably still be here today (wouldn't have found out I won until getting to work). Hey, even $350 million richer, might as well finish out the last day.
That's the way we all say it, but, sure, reality is I would have been out the door quicker than it takes Rush Limbaugh to down a Big Mac.
There are certainly people who play these lottery numbers every day. They sink the dollars into the hope of a big payout.
Me? I wait until it's one of those super payouts. Don't even think about the Powerball until it hits at least $200 million. The first time I picked up a Mega Millions ticket was yesterday.
I don't know why. Certainly, any lottery winning would be welcomed. It just seems like there are better things to do with a couple of bucks than sink them into lottery tickets.
Then again, how much is the Powerball worth this week?
Of course, even if I had won, I'd probably still be here today (wouldn't have found out I won until getting to work). Hey, even $350 million richer, might as well finish out the last day.
That's the way we all say it, but, sure, reality is I would have been out the door quicker than it takes Rush Limbaugh to down a Big Mac.
There are certainly people who play these lottery numbers every day. They sink the dollars into the hope of a big payout.
Me? I wait until it's one of those super payouts. Don't even think about the Powerball until it hits at least $200 million. The first time I picked up a Mega Millions ticket was yesterday.
I don't know why. Certainly, any lottery winning would be welcomed. It just seems like there are better things to do with a couple of bucks than sink them into lottery tickets.
Then again, how much is the Powerball worth this week?
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
Rise and Shine --- What's next?
Good Morning and welcome to another glorious winter day!
After the roller coaster that was 2010 crashed and burned last week, it's time to pick up the pieces. Maybe it will get better, maybe it won't. Just have to take each day as it comes and hope for the best.
Anyway, one of the oddest stories of 2011 has been THIS ONE about the birds that suddenly crashed dead in Arkansas.
There were all kinds of rumors out there from secret government weapons testing to an alien attack.
The official word is the birds got confused after a fireworks display and dove, head-first, into the ground. Now, birds might not have the biggest brains in the world, but I find it hard to believe they would commit mass suicide after a fireworks display.
There has to be something more going on here. Right? Come on conspiracy people, what really happened?
Never mind, they just wanted to leave Arkansas as quick as possible.
After the roller coaster that was 2010 crashed and burned last week, it's time to pick up the pieces. Maybe it will get better, maybe it won't. Just have to take each day as it comes and hope for the best.
Anyway, one of the oddest stories of 2011 has been THIS ONE about the birds that suddenly crashed dead in Arkansas.
There were all kinds of rumors out there from secret government weapons testing to an alien attack.
The official word is the birds got confused after a fireworks display and dove, head-first, into the ground. Now, birds might not have the biggest brains in the world, but I find it hard to believe they would commit mass suicide after a fireworks display.
There has to be something more going on here. Right? Come on conspiracy people, what really happened?
Never mind, they just wanted to leave Arkansas as quick as possible.
Monday, January 3, 2011
Rise and Shine --- Happy New Year
Good Morning and welcome to a fresh, new perspective!
Unlike any other year, when somebody says 'Happy New Year' it has a little more meaning. In fact, years from now when somebody asks "Remember in 2010...?"
My reaction is going to be "No. Didn't exist!"
Somebody said the other day, "You know, some people have bad days, bad weeks, I have bad years."
Well, I'm with you. Dump 2010 in the proverbial dumpster. Take it out with the garbage. Well, if you live in Upper Darby, don't wait for garbage pickup, it might not come.
While on the way out ... Never mind.
No, this is start of a New Year. A clean slate. Time to pick up the pieces and knock a few heads.
By the way, Billy Joel was right:
Unlike any other year, when somebody says 'Happy New Year' it has a little more meaning. In fact, years from now when somebody asks "Remember in 2010...?"
My reaction is going to be "No. Didn't exist!"
Somebody said the other day, "You know, some people have bad days, bad weeks, I have bad years."
Well, I'm with you. Dump 2010 in the proverbial dumpster. Take it out with the garbage. Well, if you live in Upper Darby, don't wait for garbage pickup, it might not come.
While on the way out ... Never mind.
No, this is start of a New Year. A clean slate. Time to pick up the pieces and knock a few heads.
By the way, Billy Joel was right:
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